OUT OF THE MENTAL HOSPITAL WEEK 2: SLOWLY BUT SURELY

I'm so glad I'm writing all this down so that I can see where we've been and where we are going.

Our son is on week two of a Partial Hospital Program as part of his treatment for a mental collapse during this summer. Here's this week's review:

Week 2

Monday: Did not want to go to the treatment program. Did not want to take his meds and asked why we were doing all this. He is on 4 meds right now during this fragile time. Afternoon was good and he was in higher spirits.

Tuesday: Was more agreeable. Doctor added an med he used to be on for mood stabilization. This made a remarkable difference in a positive way.

Wednesday: Better day. Good night. Physical workout each night helps immensely with depression.

Thursday: Same good day as Wednesday.

Friday: Asked why he had to go to program. Difficulty taking meds, but finally agreed.

Saturday: We stayed home for most of the day and relaxed.Went to small party for a friend but was overwhelmed by noise. Went with brother to a coffee shop. This was better.

Sunday: Went to church for the first time in months. Better day.

Went out with friends all day and up until 10:00 PM at night. Too long of a day, but positive until having to take meds. 

Monday: Could not wake up in time to catch bus. Had to take him to classes.

All in all, there's very little depression this week and no violence or outward yelling.

He needs lots of space.

Downside: Short term memory is being wiped out by his medications. No long term effect, but still scary.

***
For today's 5 minute break, I'll take you to a wonderful song by Mandisa. If you've never experienced Mandisa, then hold on. She's a powerful positive influence in this world and I love her music!
Enjoy!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z29olPjFbqg

drawing by Paul Klee

KEEP ON PUSHIN' BACK THE DARK

Our son is out of his second round in a Psychiatric Hospital.

He is now in a Partial Hospitalization Program

and he is fighting hard to not be depressed.

***

It's our job as parents to always stay OPTIMISTIC

to stay POSITIVE

to PRAISE the small accomplishments.

Mental illness is not anyone's fault,

and it can happen suddenly

to just about anyone.

Read some of the online stories and you'll see.

***

We take no small victory for granted.

The idea of JOY is slowly returning.

The idea that there is a BETTER FUTURE is creeping into the dark cave

that we call mental illness.

The medicines can meet us half way,

but there needs to be a circle of smiling faces

around the campfire

looking back at each other

and PUSHING BACK THE DARKNESS...which leads me to this song...

***

It's called 'Pushing Back the Dark' by Josh Wilson

Light a Candle and listen

and then listen again and again.

My gift to you, my friend.

You do not sit there in the darkness alone.

I'm here with you.

David/:0)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=co2gthaWVrQ
"The Simple Version" of the song:

The "Fancy" Version of the song:

butterflies in a store

DON'T STOP BELIEVING

Our loved one is coming home today from an extended time in a psychiatric ward.

We have no idea what to expect, but we hope for the best.

People with OCD, schizophrenia, mood disorders, and depression often feel like

prisoners of their own minds. They feel powerless.

Perhaps this little story will help.

***

Victor Frankl had every reason to stop believing.

A prisoner in a Nazi prison camp;

Victor watched as every prisoner came to terms

with losing all and facing death daily.

Victor noticed to his utter amazement that some

prisoners shared their meager rations with others.

No guard could stop this act of kindness.

No force could stop their utter

sacrifice.

The were not powerless.
***

For Victor, he realized at that moment

that no matter how much we have lost

we have one thing inside of us that will always

be safe from any evil force...

that is our decision to be a light

in the face of darkness.

There's much more...but for now

DON'T STOP BELIEVING!

***

Today's my 100th post and the song is exactly what

we need.

A fun version of

'Don't Stop Believing' by Vance Perry

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v8C_w3ipMwY

QUESTIONS...BUT TURN ON THE MUSIC WHILE YOU READ IT

This blog has taken a turn...

down a road

that I don't understand
&

that I can't follow

without God.
QUESTION:

How can someone come home from work

each day

and look in their family member's room

his empty room

and remember

that 

he is in a psychiatric ward?
That's what happened this week. I can't write about it yet.

But I promise

that for those of you have gone before me

I will read your blogs

and listen to your stories.

Because I don't have a clue what's next.

The hospital is nice

and the doctor's are the best.
***

That's good

because he's a complicated case.
Bad things are happening inside his brain right now.

Yet....

somewhere

inside is our son...

the             one        we      used       to        know....
and that we will always love.

***

Today's 5 minute break is a song
with words that comfort

and a message 

for anyone
going
 through
a
 tough time.

The song, "Worn" sung  by Tenth Avenue North.

Thank God for songwriters like these.

And considering this video has over 500,000 views, there are many

others who feel the same.

Thanks for stopping by.

from the ever hopeful,

D/:0)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zulKcYItKIA

TIME TO BEAT OCD AGAIN & AGAIN & AGAIN

This week was the most difficult of all for our son.

He has come to a point of giving up 

because

his OCD thoughts block him at every move.

His violence and rage is aimed at those around him.

And especially his family.

So he is getting medical treatment at a hospital this week.

PRAY PRAY PRAY

That something good will happen!

***

In the mean time, it's time to BEAT OCD...

even if it is symbolically with drums and bongos.

Here's a fantastic Danish drumming group called Safri duo.

David/:0)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Sj3omZEB8s&list=PLB259DDDE07D9404A

FAMILIES WITH DISABILITIES: HOLD ON TO YOUR DREAMS NO MATTER WHAT

It's fun to dream about your child becoming an Olympic star,

or running the marathon,

or being a professional athlete.

Many children dream of such.

It's a dream that stays alive in children...

the dream of becoming famous someday.

At some point,

our children grow up and start to realize

that their dream 

was a part of their childhood;

a part just like the little teddy bear

or the little toys

that remain on the shelf 

long after the children go off on their own

***

Children with disabilities have dreams too.

Dreams that

bring a 

knowing smile (and a touch of sadness)

to their parents' hearts.
Parents with children that have mental disorders
also hold on to dreams.

But mental challenges and disorders are an invisible

wall for an otherwise able-bodied child.

And thus the sting of reality for these parents is often twice as 

hard to bear.

But don't despair. You need to watch today's 5 minute break.
Here's one of the most

hopeful, most stirring, and most inspirational moments

I've ever found on my search to bring you

a wonderful, and joyous 

5 minute break.

David/:0)

***

Meet 14-year old Jack Carroll

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=taTSxDVEHRM#at=81

our kitten

OCD + CAFFEINE (STIMULANTS) = CHAOS

The line up of 'bad guys' when it comes to caffeine

MOUNTAIN DEW THROWBACK = 54mg caffeine

SUNDROP= 63mg caffeine

Lipton Can of Tea (not shown)=  only 8mg caffeine

AMP energy = 142mg caffeine (you'd have to float away drinking 17 3/4 cans of tea to equal the caffeine)

FULL THROTTLE=200 mg of caffeine (equivalent to 20 cans of Lipton tea!)

***

Only after the terrible mood swings, anger, verbal attacks, irritability, and threats

did we start to suspect that our son had added something to his diet.

The energy drink addiction started when he was given a FREE sample 

at the local rodeo when he was 14 years old.

Caffeine addiction is a threat to many people with OCD because

it puts their intrusive thoughts into overdrive.

For our son, he appears frozen in place like a statue

after having too much caffeine.

That's because every thought and action is blocked

by his OCD mind telling him

 that

 'if he moves this way or sits down

or goes into his room' 

the world

 will end.

So he does nothing but freeze

out of fear of doing something wrong.

Such is our life with OCD & caffeine addiction.

Working through caffeine withdrawal is horrible & also my next topic.

Stay tuned.

Thanks for stopping by.

David/:0)

***

For today's 5 minute break I'll show you something very different

and very wonderful. 

Shadows will never be the same.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4Fv98jttYA

THE IMPOSSIBLE DREAM

Mine is for doctor's to find the final answer

for OCD!

And for my son to live a life free from intrusive OCD thoughts.

What's yours?

****

The Impossible Dream

is today's 5 minute break.

You'll be inspired....I promise!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oSFKnc93to8

a monarch butterfly in our garden

Thanks for stopping by!

David/:0)

GETTING PAST OCD & FAMILY SECRETS

First read this quote:

"I was about 12 or 13 when I developed my eating disorder, and at that time nobody in the public eye talked about their body issues," said Lovato, who has sought treatment in the past for substance abuse, bulimia and bipolar disorder. "I feel that if someone had admitted they had a problem, then I wouldn't have gone down that route myself."

"That's my goal in talking about my problems: I want to be the person for other girls that I needed to admire when I was looking for help and strength," Lovato added, "and it's OK to love your body the way it is, and it's OK to reach out for help if you have drug and alcohol problems, or if you're self-harming or being bullied."
                                                            source: The Huffington Post ~ June 10,2013 online source

When I started this online journal, I had to decide if our son's OCD, autism, caffeine & sugar addictions and social phobias would stay a family secret....or
be out there for the public to see.

The choice became much easier when I started searching on Google for 

other families dealing with these multiple issues.

There wasn't a lot out there to read.

Since that time, I've found celebrities that have faced addictions that could easily ruin their careers and stay hidden from public view. Others have decided to help others with the same struggles.....like Demi Lovato.
And I've decided to do the same.
David/:0)

***

Here's her song 'Heart Attack' for today's phenomenal 5 minute break. Enjoy!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AByfaYcOm4A

a flower from my garden

DEATH BY A MONSTER? (ENERGY DRINK)... MAYBE SO!

If your teenager or loved one has a heart condition

and they drink high caffeine energy drinks..

STOP THEM IMMEDIATELY!

Better safe than sorry.

Here's the story of a 14-year old girl whose parents believe she died from energy drinks:

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/4605284/monster-energy-drinks-sued-after-girl-dies.html

And here's the latest update. It looks like the Monster Energy Drink Co. has something to think about!

http://www.cnbc.com/id/100779705

Of course the MONSTER ENERGY DRINK company

is fighting back and declaring there's no connection.
BUT....

Caffeine toxicity is NOT going away and the research is just beginning.

HIGH TIME it did.

Just go into any convenience store and look at the vast array of

energy drinks out there. It's staggering.

EVERYONE'S IN THE BUSINESS OF ENERGY!!!

***

But what's more alarming is the constant pursuit of these 

companies for social acceptance.

It's like EVERYBODY'S GOT TO HAVE AN ENERGY DRINK

to make it through the day.
 Maybe two or three! 

The heck with the warning labels....drink on 'til ya drop, baby!

And of course,
COFFEE HAS ALREADY MADE IT TO THE

MUST HAVE IT OR DIE level of acceptance.
BUT...

Talk to a doctor dealing with sleep disorders and sleep problems

and I'll bet the first question out of his mouth is:

How much caffeine do you have each day?

For our son, his OCD goes off the charts in intensity each time he sneaks a caffeine drink without

our knowledge. Caffeine is like poison to him.

The battle with energy drinks is a daily occurrence.

***

Here's a different kind of battle and a fun one for today's 5 minute break.

Here's CELLO WARS by the Piano Guys.

David/:0)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgAlQuqzl8o

Full Throttle got bumped to 2nd place in severity this week.

Monster Absolutely Zero is now 1st place in wreaking havoc

with our son's OCD symptoms. 

We almost had to take him to the hospital after he drank one

since it precipitated psychotic behaviors.

More on that topic later!

WHERE TO BEGIN ON THE THERAPY JOURNEY

As parents, we work with a psychologist who

specializes in OCD.

Our son has a number of conditions that complicate matters

and this makes it a team effort on what to do first.

Here are the categories:

OCD

Asperger Syndrome

Caffeine addiction

Sugar addiction

Panic attacks

Some of these are internal and some have external sources.

For example, you can DECIDE if you want to guzzle an energy drink

loaded with caffeine.
On the other hand,

b you can't DECIDE to have Asperger Syndrome.

You also
 can't decide to have PANIC ATTACKS

or OCD. 

So our son and the pyschologist decided to work on the one area that is

most debilitating.

So....we are starting with PANIC ATTACKS.

PANIC ATTACKS can really ruin a day, a job, a relationship, a life.

So wish us luck!

***

Today's 5 minute break is another fine song from Nicole Cross.

Here's her version of Daft Punk's "Get Lucky".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vmrPrYJPqI&feature=em-subs_digest

from our garden this June day

TIME TO BEAT OCD AGAIN & AGAIN

Every time I feel crazy and helpless

against our son's 

battle with OCD

I find a great drummer

that can BEAT this mental disorder...

even if it is symbolically.

Today you are in for a real treat for 

today 

you meet

Fede Rabaquino from Uruguay.

He's got to be the most upbeat (pun intended)

and happiest drummer on the planet.

David/:0)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K125X_RFyaE

His story:

Hi everybody my name is Fede Rabaquino and I was born on November 8th, 1983 in Montevideo Uruguay. I first started playing drums when I was 10 years old, I’ve always loved music and especially drumming. Although I play different instruments I found that through drums I could make people happy, make them laugh with me and surprise them by doing crazy stuff like unexpected stick tricks and wild jumps all the way through my drums 
Sometimes people say to me that they can feel the happiness and fun I’m having when I play drums, that’s true and I really can’t show another face other than a BIG SMILE when playing because I’m doing what I love!!!

In 2006 I was studying architecture at “Montevideo’s University” and I wasn’t as happy as you see me today in the videos I’m uploading, I wasn’t sure enough if I could make a career as a musician in my country because most of the people I know that are musicians don’t live exclusively by playing music, they have other jobs and most of the time are stressed because it’s very difficult to earn enough money to live decently.
But I took the risk and gave it a try because I could never work as an architect or behind a desk for 9 hours a day, I needed to start pursuing what I felt was my dream, so that year I stopped studying architecture and move to Argentina to study in the Contemporary Music School.

I always think that great thing are still to come and I pray to God to have good health and stay mentally focused to handle all the blessings and obstacles I’ll meet in my path.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR TAKING THE TIME TO READ THIS AND KNOW ME A LITTLE BIT MORE.

YOU ARE AWESOME!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6wamfhN1Ag

CONVERSATIONS WITH A SUGAR & CAFFEINE ADDICT

Each day our son battles OCD

and autism.

The intrusive thoughts are made worse by

having extra sugar and caffeine.

His behavior regarding these two drugs (yes, they are both drugs...albeit legal)

is one of an addict.

Here's today dialogue:

"Dad, I need money for lunch."

"No, eat something here."

"But we don't have anything to eat." (but what he really means is that there's nothing he likes)

"You spent the money  on energy drinks and a bag of chips last time."

"But I won't this time. Just give me another chance." (the mantra of all addicts)

"OK, but where will you go?"

"Taco Cabana and get some tacos."

"Here's $7.00....exactly enough."

ONE HOUR LATER....

he walks in with a bag of chips.

"Did you eat lunch son?"

"No."

"Why do you have a bag of chips?"

"I don't know."

"Did you drink an energy drink with caffeine and sugar?"

"I don't remember?"

And of course he did.
His counselor, his doctor, his psychiatrist, a sleep specialist,

and of course his parents have told him that energy

are forbidden since they elevate his OCD off the charts.

And so ends his chances for future money....at least until

we figure out what to do.
Never give an addict cash. Go with them to buy the item they need.

***

Time for a 5 minute break. Here's the Cello Song

by the Piano Guys. (I know that doesn't make sense...it's a long story.)

Thanks for visiting. It means a lot to have others thinking about & praying for our son.

David/:0)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ry4BzonlVlw

from my garden

HOW DO YOU SAY GOOD-BYE...FOREVER?

Zach wrote songs to say good-bye.

He died of cancer last month at

a very young age.

But here he is...on his own videos.

***

And the lesson for us all....don't take any day for granted.

And don't put off loving those around you!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?annotation_id=annotation_290795&feature=iv&src_vid=sDC97j6lfyc&v=KvSYZHmhIAM

and in Zach's own words if you care to watch...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nECijjMl8yY

OCD, ASPERGER SYNDROME & GUNS

I don't like writing this.
I was held up at gunpoint in my front yard last week.

He didn't shoot

and I didn't give him my wallet.

We fought to a draw and I'm glad for that.

But as I talked to my friends

some have asked if I had a gun.

The answer is 'no'.

It's not that I'm against them.

I was raised on a large Texas ranch back in the 1960s where we needed guns for

protection against venomous snakes

and sometimes wild packs of dogs.

We were also hunters.

But what stops me now from having a gun

is the unpredictability of children.

You don't have to have a child with OCD

or a child with Autism

to worry about guns in the home.

Just any child will do.

Children and guns don't mix.

Here are some examples of children with guns and what can happen:

Eight year old dies at gun show...

http://www.nbcnews.com/id/27399337/ns/us_news-life/t/boy-accidentally-kills-self-gun-show/#.UbnFwvm1F28

And here's a list of examples collected by a pediatrician of small children who died

accidentally from firing a loaded gun:

http://pediatrics.about.com/od/safety/a/gun-accidents.htm

***

Today I found a song that uses an unloaded gun

as part of the sound effects.

I'm not sure it counts as a relaxing 5 minute break.

But it's a much better use of a gun

than a child aiming one at another person.

All for now,

David/:0)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8XWKpAZWRBg

OCD: CHANGING SUGAR, CAFFEINE, & MEDICATION LEVELS ALL AT ONCE

We made a mistake today.
Never attempt 2 or 3 changes
at once
in your battle against OCD.
Here's why:
Our son had severe depression today.
Could it be the new medicine?
Or that he is trying to give up sugar?
Or that he has cut down on caffeine?
Or a combination of two or three of the above?
We can't know for sure and that's our
mistake.
Just change one thing at a time
at least for a week or two.
Then change something else.
***
Time for a 5 minute reality break. This music video
won all sorts of awards including
BEST CONCEPT VIDEO.
Enjoy & thanks for stopping by.
Here's the Norwegian group "a-ha" and 'Take On Me'.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djV11Xbc914

from the Houston butterfly center

:0)

TEAR YOU APART...ADDICTIONS THAT IS

An addiction is a behavior

that is known to be harmful

and yet

the participant continues

to involve themselves 

in the behavior

in greater and greater

amounts...

until

it tears you apart.

OCD is a tough thing to have.

But when you add in addictions,

it becomes a monster

that can't be controlled.

It's good to be honest about it all.

We all have some weakness for addictions...

even workaholics can get addicted to work

much to their bosses delight...

but to everyone else's dismay.

Time for a break.

***

Here's a fun Danish group called

NovemberDecember.

It's homemade music and a bit raw,

but that's the fun of it all.

David/:0)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSRx08t9XYU

n..y

VIVA LA MUSIC COVERS!

It's very doubtful

that anyone

would 

ever

become

a celebrity

for having OCD.

***

ON THE OTHER HAND....

My other son wants to

be a famous

musician.

And we will let him

pursue his dream for a year or so and see what happens.

Since I've started finding

5 minute breaks 

for you

I've learned a lot about 'covers'.

Cover songs are wonderful

and amazingly varied....

I love them!

And here's a secret......

some 

are 

actually 

better than the original, million dollar versions!

Viva la Covers!

***

Here's Mike Squillante

with one of the best covers 

for a famous song called "Loved You First"

by One Direction

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bd3SfC2UntM&list=UU4xGb7n7n8b6ZUGa2DPrUQw&index=10

bones, glass and shells from a river in Wharton County

n...y

HOW DO YOU PICK YOUR RITUALS?

Rituals...

are things you have to do in an exact order

and/or 

an exact number of times

or...

something bad will happen.

At least that's what the OCD mind believes.

They can also be called compulsions...

actions that MUST BE DONE!

***

But how do you pick your ritual?

How do you choose the number of times you must do something?

For my son, he can't tell me.

He just knows he must do it until it feels right.

Probably the hardest ritual we both have to endure

is a gagging ritual.

It sounds awful...and he has to take medicine for 

it to go away.

We just finished about an hour episode of this.

Time for a break...and I need a good one.

David/:0)

***

Today I found a new group called Eclipse.

Their best song so far is a rendition of Taylor Swift's '22'.

A cappella never sounded so good.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cpu35i2yqC0

an aloe from my garden

n

TIME TO BEAT OCD....AGAIN!

Every time I want to beat OCD...

to rid my son of his

endless battle...

with

this mental condition...

instead

of 

getting

angry...
 I look for a symbolic

way
to beat the disease.

Yes, I try to find someone

really great at drums.
Let's beat OCD!

***

Today you're in for a treat.

This 10-year old loves to play 

the drums

and as the title suggests,

she owns them!

David/:0)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0HT-7xttds

palm tree patterns in our garden

y