LOVED, NOT TOLERATED...THE OCD TRAP

People were designed to be loved. They seek it, they hold on to it,

and they get better when it happens.

On the other hand,

no person wants to be tolerated.

We don't like to be tolerated.

We push away from people who just tolerate us.

With OCD, our son is often misunderstood.

The tapping, the touching, the extra movements...

all show up on human radar as strange.

Something to be tolerated.

As parents, the movements are something we can easily accept.

That's because we love him. 

***

Today's break is a song called 'Good Times' by Owl City.

This brother & sister duet has a fun version of the song.

Enjoy your 5 minute break!

And thanks for stopping by.

David/:0)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5ztVL_ii8c

y

ANXIETY, THUNDER, & FEAR

Our son has always had a fear of loud noises, especially unpredictable claps of thunder.

He says that loud noises make the OCD commands louder.

It makes them scream at him.

The thunder lasted for five or six hours on Saturday with wave after wave

of storms rolling in.

It was miserable for him. 

Like a trapped animal.

Like a person trapped in a cage with his own mind.

No amount of comfort was enough.

He finally went to bed exhausted from the travails.

****

And his parents are just as tired of watching.

I need a break!

This one is from a fine young violinist who seems to 

have a knack for improving each time

he makes a new video.

Here's Jun Sung Ahn...all 3 of them!

Thanks for stopping by today.

David/:0)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8vHblMjqJfs

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OUT THE DOOR to NOWHERE

One of the hardest things we have to do with our son is get him out the door 

to his therapy sessions.

We give ourselves a 2 hour lead time.

And even then....he doesn't show up on time.

It's like his OCD mind high-jacks his regular brain on the way to therapy!

***

Today's break is quite entertaining and unusual.

I won't spoil it for you.

The group is called Postmodern Jukebox.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KyiXlU2nTqE

n...Y!

WHATEVER TOMORROW BRINGS....WE WON'T BE SHAKEN

Having some very hard days with our son's OCD.

Good song to listen for a 5 minute break...

by Building 429

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iFld2jeqKfw David/:0) n...Y!

VISUAL OF WHAT CBT IS LIKE

CBT stands for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.

Our son is starting this therapy this week.

Here's how it was explained to us:

Suppose you have voices endlessly shouting TURN AROUND!

And you don't want to turn around, but the voices are yelling this so loudly 

that it must be true. And so you feel silly, but you turn around....all day long!

The CBT treatment for this person might be listening to a tape of

this person's voice describing in detail the fears 

of what might happen if they don't turn around.

This person would listen to this tape many times for many days

and after awhile the voices yelling 'turn around' 

might start to blend into the background.

The voices would get weaker and weaker.

Weak enough to finally ignore.

Our psychologist put it this way:

The normal response to an intrusive thought is to push it away. 

Instead, with CBT you would grab hold of it like grabbing a large balloon.

You would wrestle with the balloon (intrusive thought)

and as it loses air, it would start to shrink in your arms...

and finally become almost nothing.

***

Our 5 minute break is a stunning video called

It's Time by Imagine Dragons. It's an allegory.

The sun finally shines in this wasteland...but at a heavy price.

Allegorically, sometimes a part of us must die (like intrusive thoughts)

in order for us to live.

This is the start of our CBT journey. I'll keep you posted.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sENM2wA_FTg

Here's one of my photos taken at an art museum

with my younger son.

n...Y!

DON'T YOU WORRY, DON'T YOU WORRY CHILD

A beautiful little song by a wonderful new singer Nicole Cross 

from Germany!

And....don't you worry...it's going to be all right.

Enjoy your 5 minute break!

David/:0)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1DP63WEUaAI&list=RD02pswQwKDwLw8

Here's one of my sunset photos for you to enjoy!

y

GOTTA GET UP....DEPRESSION AND OCD

OCD can be overwhelmingly depressing.

Think about it.

Your own mind is your worst enemy

Your own actions seem out of your control.

Some thoughts are just lies while other thoughts are the truth.

And it takes constant work to tell them apart.

You wonder if the germs on every surface are going to kill you.

And you wonder if anyone notices your struggles.

Depression can keep you in bed for an entire day.

Why get up?

Why go to work when every thought is a battle?

And every decision comes with fear of failure.

But still you have to try, try, try.

Our son's psychologist tells him these words every week.

It will get better the more times you walk right through the

fear and on to the other side.

You MUST try.

****

Today's break has that thought put to words.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VEZpUu2f9dY

And today's flower from my garden!

David/:0)

n...Y!

HOW MUCH CAN ONE PERSON DO?

How much can just one person do?

About OCD?

About a cure?

About helping with CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy)?

About finding support for a family in crises?

***

Maybe there's a cure...

Maybe there's a new therapy...

Maybe there's a new medication....

Maybe there's a new book to read...

that will help with our son's OCD.

How much can just one person do?

Just watch today's 5 minute break to find out.

I promise, if this musician were to turn psychologist...

the world would be amazed at her talent.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohinPqV3cMs

One Thing by One Direction....cover by the very talented Morgan Wheeler

n

HOW IS THE MOVIE AVATAR LIKE THE OCD MIND?

My son constantly fights his OCD mind.

Right now it is telling him that if he goes to a Whataburger, the world will blow up.

Can he fight back?

Will he overcome such a thought?

To him it feels real.

It's crippling from the inside out.

And his choices to overcome these thoughts seem overwhelming.

***

For today's break, we see another battle set to the beautiful music 

and images of Avatar.

In this battle, the person has to decide which reality will be his own

and which he will leave behind.

His battle is outward...the choice between two bodies
and two ways of life.
OCD is a battle that's inward...the choice between following
the intrusive thoughts and their fears
or the normal thoughts and hope.

(click the link below to see two versions...the first one is MUCH better)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3YDz-ftqr1g

n...Y!

OCD AND REPEPETITIONS

One aspect of OCD that seems to get the most news coverage is the constant 

repetitions caused by the disorder.

My son does not have the 'hand washing' type of OCD, though I

have seen someone with it. His hands were red and raw from putting chemicals 

and soaps on his poor skin.

Our son does have what I call 'directional' OCD since he must go around objects instead of going in a straight line.

He also has what I've termed 'Second Choice' OCD since he will pass up the first choice every time.

His OCD mind tells him to go around things or to pick the second option of drinks, food, even bathrooms.

Examples:

He will drive to the second gas station to fill up his car.

He will go around a parking lot and decide/undecide 20 or 30 times before picking 

the correct parking spot.

And he will turn on water faucets 4 or 5 times in a row before keeping it on.

The worst example of 'second choice' OCD occurred about 12 years ago.

HERE'S WHAT HAPPENED:

When he was about 10 years old, he got into the backseat of our car.

Except he didn't.

Instead, he opened then slammed shut the car door and went behind

the car to the other side.

Since I thought he was already in the car, I started to back out of the driveway.

I heard a scream.

It was our son yelling at me to stop.

I had almost run over him with the car.

Never trust the logic of OCD. Instead, trust your eyes. 

***

Today's break is a much nicer form of repetition...one that will bring you a smile.

David/:0)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7upNeUhnthU

n...y?

DAYLIGHT AND SOME GOOD NEWS

We went down to the Texas Medical Center today

and got some good news about our son.

His faster heart rate (due to medication?)

will not affect his heart in the long term.

It will not 'burn out' sooner because it is beating faster.

***

Today's break brings us more 'Daylight'

but this time

an a capella version with some awesome harmonies.

Enjoy your break! 

David/:0)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zzoBDPsd1b0

n

WAY TOO HARD, SO I'M WAITING FOR DAYLIGHT

Our son is trapped in the OCD loop.

What does that mean?

It means one part of his mind is fighting the other.

These are called intrusive thoughts....thoughts that come in

like a bolt of lightning

and announce that he must not do something

or the world will blow up.

Right now his OCD mind is telling him

that our house is bad and that the air is suffocating him.

This causes him to hold his breath until he can regain

the truth.
Minutes pass and it happens again.

It's a never ending battle.

And it's just as hard for the parents as the child.
Time for a break from the battle.

***

Today's break is brought to you by Maroon 5

and Playing For Change.

The song is called 'Daylight'.

Enjoy your break.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AqR-ElB5kXY

David/:0)

n...y!

VISUAL OF WHEN A PSYCHIATRIST & A PSYCHOLOGIST WORK CLOSELY TOGETHER

The Psychiatrist is interested in the medications and their positive effects on the patient.

The Psychologist is interested in helping the patient talk through their circumstances as well

as supporting the family.

When both work together it's magical!

Here's a visual of what I mean.

Brought to you by two rival cellists that now work together...due to a past economic downturn.

They are now the superstars of Cello Land.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XleaVcy4he8

y!

EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE WITH OCD

I'm learning that my son's OCD is never ending.

Unrelenting...

the sky blows up

if something is not touched

or not done

or opened....or opened the wrong way.

Every breath you take,

is a breath filled with anxiety

and fear...

That is your life with OCD.

I have to take a break now.

David/:0)

***

"Every Breath You Take" by the Two Cellos will do nicely.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oobbRZlVTg4

n

I WISH I COULD FIX YOU

The new medicine had the opposite effect and actually made the OCD thoughts worse.

It will take about 24 hours to wear off.

In the meantime his anger and anxiety are off the charts.

It's been a miserable day.

And we are still in the middle of it.

The one positive note, if you can call it that, it that our son can describe what's happening.

He says the thoughts are so intense that they are like the sun turning into a meteor and

hitting him in the brain. The thoughts tell him where to go and what to do 

or something bad will happen....the world will end.

All I can say is that I wish I could fix you...or at least trade places with you.

I hope help will come soon.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JI-o25K6B-E

David/:0)

n

SIDE EFFECTS

We are trying a new medicine for out son's OCD. The good news: it has very little in the way of side effects.
The bad news: the one side effect seems to be heightened emotions.
Everything is a drama.
Hopefully this will smooth out over time.
Trying new medications for mental disorders is one of the hardest things we do as parents.
Here's a 5 minute break brought to you by the Piano Guys.

Relax and Enjoy!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VcnzqKpFZ0I&list=UUmKurapML4BF9Bjtj4RbvXw&index=1

n

USE YOUR TIME TO LOVE OTHERS

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Syt2pNAyJcU

Every minute counts with your child for we don't know what tomorrow brings.

y

REST & OCD

REST is a very precious commodity.
Especially when battling an illness...
a mental illness...
a family member's mental illness
Like our son's OCD.
I always feel like I'm on staff at a fire station.
Everything is quiet, but still you are on pins and needles
fully alert
and ready at a moment
for an emergency....
Our son screams
when things go wrong.
Part of that is his autism
and part is his OCD.
I need to rest and get my adrenalin down to normal levels.
*****
I like this song
after a hard day.
****
Enjoy your break & thanks for stopping by.
David/:0)

The song is called 'Rest"....and it's very difficult to find  even on Youtube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cMzVjtrQZL0

Y!

BEYOND BELIEF ~ ALL ROADS LEAD TO THE OCDI IN BOSTON

We got our acceptance letter today for our son.

I hope our trip

goes smoother than this fellows.

Here's a fun retro video from 1990's Petra

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-Ux9Sp66b8

Y

A LOVE THAT QUIETS ALL MY FEARS

BEST FIVE MINUTE SONG FOR THIS DAY

from,

David

"....finding rare, hidden treasure in the vast ocean of youtube"

186,665

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KqrsELRaabo